Japanese euphemism of the day: “soft touch”. Not, as you may expect, a word meaning “lenient”. Rather, it indicates that touching the hostesses outside of the bathing suit area is a-ok. And we don’t mean the changing rooms.
As ever, we know what you’re thinking. “Hang on a second ORAZ team,” you interject, “now, is that a zone that lies outside a one-piece swimming costume or bikini you’re talking about? Not because I need to know for any particular reason or anything, but more just out of curiosity. You know. This is the kind of information you pick up without any intention of ever putting it to any practical use anywhere at any time.”
We hear you, strangely defensive and overly-strenuously protesting your innocence reader, and we appreciate why it’s an important question to ask. One of the reasons for this is that “one-piece” means “dress” in Japan. Obviously, if that was the case one must assume that would leave one’s options few and far between if one wished to avoid being caught offside by the “kyabakura” referee. (FYI – Taking our cue from the professional teases in question, we’ll save “kyabakura” for another installment of J-phemism of the day.)
The Of Rice and Zen team are informed, however, that the amount of straying your hands can do is dictated less by the rules of the establishment and more by the contents of your bank account. You may or may not be surprised to hear that hands attached to men with fat wallets are less likely to be slapped away. Metaphor for society at large? You be the judge.
This is all, of course, academic (when did “academic” come to mean “irrelevant”, by the way) unless you are Japanese as the kind of establishment we’re talking about do not welcome people whose faces don’t look Japanese enough. In fact they are wont to give you the crossed forearms “X” that constitutes a wordless refusal in Japan.
This is of course shocking and racist, but the wily sex club owner is smart enough to know that very few rejected gaijin have the stones to rock up to a police station and complain that the sex club next door won’t let them in for a hand shandy and some “soft touch”. Racial discrimination is no more or less illegal than the “secret special services” offered at such establishments, so if you’re in for a penny you’re in for a pound.
This is all conjecture and hearsay, of course:D
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